The Scriptures detail a very high standard for the church concerning sexual purity. In this passage we are taught God’s standards, and what will be the ultimate destination for those who characterize a sexually impure lifestyle.
Teaching Notes:
Sexual Purity
Ephesians 5:3-6
Intro: Our age has got to be one of the most if not the most difficult age to live in sexual purity. We are literally bombarded with sensual stimuli from TV, videos, movies, magazines, billboards, Internet, even novels. It is everywhere. Imagine the difference if you grew up in 1724, or 1824 or 1924 in America. There was no Internet, billboards, movies, videos, TV, and probably no novels or magazines with filthy content. Of course they had sexual sin – this world has always had it – but the sensual allurements would have been greatly restricted. Today, we have few restrictions. When I was growing up, TV was fairly innocent. They didn’t have anything on TV that would be considered objectionable in the area of profanity or sexual content. But the young people today have been exposed to it day after day from infancy so that they consider it “normal”. It’s just part of American culture, even though it is diametrically opposed to the will of God.
God is calling us to sexual purity. We must break with and separate ourselves from all sexual sin and be clean before the Lord.
The context leading up to this section is Love. We are to “walk in love” (5:2). Then Paul says, “But”, which always introduces a contrast. In contrast to the self-sacrificing, others-focused, God-directed, unconditional love of Christ, avoid sexual immorality and lust. 5:1-2 describe God’s love. 5:3-4 describes the World’s lusts. Paul is shifting from self-sacrifice to self-indulgence. Satan is a Counterfeiter. Here we have his counterfeit to God’s love. Satan’s counterfeit is selfish and self-destructive. It is not concerned about commitment, but only satisfaction. It’s not concerned with giving, but getting. It has no basis for permanence because its purpose is to use rather than serve. It lasts until the one “loved” no longer satisfies.
1. God’s Commands Regarding Sexual Purity: (5:3-4)
A. What Sins Are Identified?
Sins of Action:
1) Immorality: The Greek word is “porneia” from which we get pornography. This is a general catch-all word for any kind of sexual sin. It is broad enough to include incest, homosexuality, adultery, prostitution, fornication, and bestiality. It refers to any sexual act except that between a man and his wife.
2) Any Impurity: this word refers to anything unclean and filthy. 10 of the 11 times this word occurs in the NT, it is associated with sexual sin. This word is attached to “immorality” because it helps to explain it. Any sexually immoral act is an impure, unclean, and filthy act in the sight of God. It makes us dirty. Any: Paul does not allow room for a little impurity here or there. He says all of it must be repudiated and forsaken from our lives.
3) Greed: we usually link greed to the lust for money, but here it refers to sensual desire. It carries the idea of the greed to satisfy one’s sexual appetite outside of the bounds of marriage. These 3 sins are the marks of the lost man (4:17-19). They are characteristics of the Old Man. You are not that man any more. Be who you are!
Sins of Speech:
1) Filthiness: The following three words are synonyms and help describe one another. This word refers to filthy speech; obscenities of speech; speech with sexual overtones.
2) Silly Talk: This Greek word is “morologia.” We know that “logia” is a form of “logos” or “word.” We get our English word “moron” from the beginning of this Greek word. So, literally, this word means “words fitting for a moron.” In other words “foolish talk.” Empty conversation. This talk is both foolish and sinful.
3) Coarse Jesting: this is joking with dirty, hidden meanings. This is what some people do who turn something that is said or done, no matter how innocent, into that which is obscene or suggestive. It’s the filthy talk of a person who uses every word and circumstance to display his immoral wit. There are some things that we shouldn’t joke about: God, Christ, the Holy Spirit, sin, and judgment. All 3 of these words refer to a dirty mind expressing itself in dirty conversation.
B. What Is God’s Command Concerning These Sins?
1) They Must Not Even Be Named Among You: The NIV says “There must not even be a hint of…” So far from being true, there must not be even any grounds upon which someone could accuse you of these things. These sins are not to be tolerated at all among God’s people. There must be complete separation from them.
2) And there must be no… Paul is not saying it’s OK to do a little coarse jesting, and engage in a little silly talk and filthiness, but just not too much. He says there should be absolutely none of it.
C. Why Must Believers Refrain From These Things?
1) As Is Proper Among Saints: These things are not appropriate or “proper” among God’s people. The word “saints” refers to the “holy ones.” As God’s holy ones, it is not proper for you to engage in unholy actions or speech. These things are inconsistent with our new nature given at regeneration.
2) Which Are Not Fitting: Here Paul is saying the same thing again. These things are not proper, they are not fitting. Now that you are a New Man, these old things don’t fit any more. They are out of place with the real you.
D. What Should We Do Instead Of These Sins Of Speech?
1) But Rather Giving Of Thanks: Use your tongue to thank God for all His mercies, instead of using it to tell dirty jokes, or use obscene language. Is your life characterized by giving of thanks? Do you thank God often for all His precious gifts to you? This is what is fitting! This is what is proper for a New Man!
2. God’s Judgment Upon Those Who Violate His Commands: (5:5-6)
A. He Will Exclude All From His Kingdom: Notice that Paul lists the same 3 sins again (immoral, impure, covetous). If these are the characteristics of your life, you are unregenerate. You may fall into one of these sins like David did, but you can’t remain in them. Paul is not saying that a person who gives themselves to these sexual sins can still be saved, but will lose rewards in the heavenly kingdom. He’s saying they won’t make it to the heavenly kingdom! Why does Paul call a covetous man an idolater? Because his lusts are his god. He has exalted his own lustful desires above even God Himself! There are only 2 kingdoms: God’s and Satan’s. You will spend eternity in one or the other. If you practice sexual sin now, you will be forever excluded from God’s kingdom. Mt.25:34,41,46.
B. He Will Unleash His Wrath Upon Them: One day God will unleash His holy fury and righteous indignation upon all those who continue in sin. On Judgment Day, God’s wrath will come upon the world like a great tidal wave, consuming all. Notice it comes upon the “sons of disobedience.” These were referred to in 2:2. They are the unsaved, unregenerate of the world, who lie under the power of the world, the flesh, and the devil. They are the ones whose lives are characterized by disobedience. Saints are characterized by righteousness.
Application:
1. Beware of False Teaching: “For this you know with certainty.” “Let no one deceive you with empty words.” Beware of any teaching on eternal security that does not also insist on perseverance in faith and holiness. We have a damnable teaching in America today called “once saved – always saved.” What the people who teach this mean is that once you have made your “decision” for Christ, prayed the “sinner’s prayer”, or gotten baptized, you are always saved, not matter how you go on to live afterwards. We should be saying, “Once truly saved, always being saved.” This teaching is a lie from the pit of hell. Paul denounces this teaching right here in this passage once and for all. I’ve heard of people who say that a murderer on death row is going to go to heaven because when they were a child they prayed the sinner’s prayer. I’ve heard people say many times that so and so is saved because they “accepted Jesus” when they were a child, even though now their lives are characterized by fornication, adultery, sensuality, and the like. Do you see that statements like these are the exact opposite of what Paul is teaching us here? If your life is characterized by sexual sin, you are not saved, and you have never been saved. You are still in your sins. Paul teaches us that you will know if God has saved you by the fruit of holiness. No holiness – no salvation! The holiness does not produce salvation. Salvation produces holiness. It’s like an apple tree claiming to be an apple tree year after, but never producing any apples. Instead it is producing figs. Guess what? It’s a fig tree! You can know what you are by taking a look at what you produce!
2. Notice that God’s Wrath Will Come Upon Sinners for their Sins, not just for Rejecting Christ: “because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.” This is the reason why all mankind are condemned without salvation through Christ. A person doesn’t need to reject Jesus Christ in order to go to hell. A single sin has qualified him for God’s judgment.
3. Fight Sexual Sin By The Power of the Spirit! Resist the first motions of sin. It might be purposely looking away from a sensual billboard, or putting safeguards on your computer so you can’t get into objectionable sites. Might mean putting your TV away. Fight these temptations through the power of the Word and the Spirit.
4. Realize That These Sins Will Not Satisfy: They promise way more than they deliver. If you yield to them, you will always need more. You will become enslaved to them. It will just bring you into deeper bondage. Joy can’t co-exist with sin. Which do you want – joy or sin?
5. Realize That These Sins Will Make Your Life Miserable Now: You may think you can get away with it, that no one will ever know. “Be sure your sin will find you out!” These sins will eventually destroy your family, tear your home apart, lead to divorce, separation from your children, and guilt. They can lead to unwanted pregnancies, abortions, and sexually transmitted diseases. All of them will lead to a defiled conscience in the sight of God.
6. Recommit Yourself To Finding Satisfaction In Your Spouse: Proverbs 5:15-20. Focus your energies on a healthy, happy marriage. Take all that energy you have been putting into your fantasies, and put it into your marriage. You’ll find out what real happiness and satisfaction can be like!
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